A new French life in Bordeaux (Part One)

Clare, it has been lovely connecting with you. Thank you for participating in my occasional series, ‘Australians in France.’ I can relate to so much of what you have written - and I am sure that anyone who is thinking of a move to France will appreciate your thoughts on your experience so far. 

Clare can be found on Instagram @mme_cabernet_franks.

Please enjoy Part One of our interview.

Can you tell us a little bit about yourself and your French connection?

Although I’ve dreamt about France for much of my life, I had never been here before 2019! In 2019, I took long service leave from my work as a government lawyer in Melbourne, and my husband, Adam, and I packed up a few suitcases, a pram, travel cot, a car seat, a booster seat and a couple of backpacks and headed to LA and Europe for 4 months with our just-turned-2 year old and almost-5 year old children! Were we crazy? Maybe. Was it worth it? Absolutely. People kept telling us how hard it would be to travel for 4 months with 2 small children. My response? “It’s hard in Melbourne. I’d rather be having a hard time with 2 small children in the South of France!”

 

We visited my family in Ireland, went to London, Copenhagen, Berlin and then headed to Paris. We hadn’t booked the last 7 weeks of our stay in Europe and planned to do 10 days in Paris, a week or so in Aix-en-Provence and then head to Switzerland (via Annecy), perhaps Vienna or Italy and then back to LA for time with my in-laws, then home. We ended up loving France so much that we spent the entire last 7 weeks in France! 

 

As soon as we got back, we started learning French on Duolingo and Babbel, eating French food as much as possible and searching out the best croissants in Melbourne! 

 

What was it that prompted you to head to France with your family? How long did you anticipate staying originally?

 

We returned to Melbourne in mid-January 2020. At the time, there was increasing talk of a novel virus coming out of China - we had no clue at that time how much it would impact our lives and future. We spent the next year and a half in some level of lockdown (Melbourne had the longest in the world at that point), with the kids unable to go to daycare or school for most of 2020. The only real plus was that we were able to put a lot into our savings while we weren’t spending $500 a week on childcare fees, or anything on eating out or doing fun activities! 

 

Sadly, in late March of 2020, my wonderful mother-in-law passed away from pancreatic cancer. Andrea was not quite 70 when she passed and had only retired from work 2.5 years prior, after her diagnosis. She wasn’t able to travel during that period, so we took the kids to LA to visit as much as possible. Between the epic Melbourne covid lockdowns and the loss of Andrea, Adam and I felt like life was so short and the future so uncertain that we wanted to make the most of our lockdown savings. Over a bottle of wine and a French meal one evening, Adam said “you know, we could live in France for a year with that money” I responded “uhhh YEAH WE COULD! When should we leave?” *Adam tried to back out a few times after that conversation, but I was intent on making it happen and kept reminding him that it was his idea! 

 

For inspiration, I immediately started reading all manner of ‘we-packed-up-our -lives-and-moved-to-France’ books, the first being “But you are in France, Madame”! 

 

To undertake a trip such as yours there must have been a fair amount of preparation. What were some of the things on your pre-departure to-do list and do you have any hints for families who might be thinking of doing the same thing?

 

I’m lucky enough to have an Irish parent and had taken out my Irish citizenship in my 20s. As such, visas weren’t an issue for us. I immediately applied for the children’s Irish citizenship and discovered that between Brexit and Covid, the wait was going to be nearly 2 years! We got some advice on the type of visa Adam would need (titre de séjour) and then we started planning in earnest. We decided to rent out our house (to come back to) but to sell all our furniture, the car, etc. Because the kids and I have EU citizenship and Adam was entitled to a 5-year titre de séjour, we decided that if we liked life in France and could find work, we’d stay as long as we were happy here.

 

We started the boys in French lessons, signed ourselves up for a weekly online session with a French tutor on Preply, put sticky notes around the house with the French word for what it was ‘la chambre, le miroir, la toilette, la porte, la fenêtre’ - they were everywhere! We also made a million lists of things we needed to do/sell/buy/organise, One for leaving Australia, one for living in France. Ticking off those boxes was very satisfying! I looked up websites with useful information about moving overseas - especially to France. We looked into healthcare, school (we considered International, private and public schools), remote work opportunities, etc. I also joined a few ‘Australians in France’ facebook groups and posted with some questions about their moves and anything we needed to know. People in those groups were really helpful and I found some others who were also planning a year in France at the same time, so it was really nice to be able to discuss planning details and challenges with them.

 

My top tip is honestly to get a good relocation agent. Unless you’re fluent in French, you really need someone who can speak to immobiliers (real estate agents) about rentals, give you advice on rental (or sale) contracts, fill out school application paperwork (if kids are going to a French public school) and all your utilities contracts, and help you set up all your other paperwork - carte vitale, etc. It’s worth every penny you’ll pay them, just for the stress-reduction alone! We also leased a car for a couple of months, which you can arrange from Australia in advance.

 

My other top tip is ‘you can’t start clearing out your worldly goods too soon!’ We were packing up and still doing op-shop runs on our last day! We decided early on that we’d take only 4-5 large suitcases, much like you, Catherine. Furniture is just that and there’s plenty of amazing furniture in France, likewise clothing/fashion! We sent a suitcase of special things to mum’s house (along with the dog and cat) and shipped over 3 boxes of useful items, such as Adam’s woodworking tools and baseball gear, my Kitchenaid mixer and horse riding gear (the essentials!) and some special photos/paintings etc. Everything else could be easily bought here (and believe me, we’ve accumulated plenty of stuff already!)

 

How did you choose where you would live? Does this area live up to your expectations?

 

Initially, we thought perhaps the stunning Annecy could be a good option. We absolutely loved it when we visited in 2019, but ultimately decided that 2 people born in desert cities (Adelaide and LA) were probably not quite ready to live in the Alps winters! We considered Lyon and Montpellier, initially, before Adam googled “best places to live in France with children” and Bordeaux popped up. We struck Lyon off the list when we decided we couldn’t live 5 hours’ drive from the beach, and Montpellier off the list when I put my foot down and said that my pasty ginger self had spent enough of my life covered from head to toe in sunscreen and wasn’t really very suited to the Mediterranean life! 

 

Bordeaux was the perfect in-between. It’s a stunningly beautiful city (it truly is a mini-Paris), it’s close to beautiful countryside, medieval villages and also to the beach. The city also has a very green-thinking mairie. The public transport is excellent, a lot like Melbourne, people walk/bike/scoot everywhere, and there are wonderful little potager gardens along the riverside, as well as fruit trees in the local parcs. We adore Bordeaux and her surrounds. The weather is generally pretty good (although 2023 summer left a lot to be desired - it rained SO much.) and the beach is less than an hour away, so our little Aussie hearts are satisfied with that.  

 

Thankfully, I didn’t have to continue life as a lawyer here in France. One of the many benefits of Bordeaux is the amazing wine region! I gave up lawyer life and was lucky enough to score a job as a wine tour guide for the 2024 tourism season (March-October). I quickly learnt as much as humanly possible about wine-making, tasting and the wine history of Bordeaux, as well as some general history, and started driving tourists to Saint-Émilion and the Médoc for wine tours and tastings. It was such an incredible way to get to know the area and the wines of Bordeaux (and make some euros at the same time). I also made some truly wonderful French friends - I was one of only 3 non-French guides in the team. They’ve helped me with my French, wine and food knowledge and all manner of things - even with translating medical speak at 11pm on a Wednesday when our son ended up in hospital! 

 

You have two children. How easily did they make the transition into French living? Can you tell us a bit about their experiences of school, making friends, adjusting to new routines, food etc?

 

The boys were our biggest concern regarding the move. Our oldest was 8 and our youngest 5 when we left Australia. The oldest had a very close friendship group since childcare days, and it was truly heartbreaking to be breaking them up. We also had to leave our dog and my beloved cat behind, neither of whom would have handled the journey well at all - especially if we were to return after a year and they’d had to spend 8 weeks in quarantine. Saying goodbye to their beloved pets was excruciating.

 

Initially, we started the boys off in an international school. Again, if we only stayed in France for a year it felt a little kinder for them to spend half their week in French and half in English, to have friends in similar situations to them who they could bond with over that experience, and for us to have some expat friends too. Unfortunately, the school we chose had only just opened the new campus we’d chosen and the administration wasn’t great, so we ended up moving them to a French public school after only one term. They made friends with a lovely boy from that school though and our families have become really close. 

 

Adjusting to French school was tough, especially for our eldest. The language was exhausting for them and they’d often spend the evenings having meltdowns over minor things and crying, which is not normal for our boys. However, we were lucky to have a school that had an international section so it has a wonderful French language catch up program. The boys had 6 hours a week of intensive French classes and our youngest even scored above average in the National school testing in January (after only starting there in November!). 

 

Our oldest son struggled to make friends as the grade 4 kids already had strongly-established friendships. The youngest was fine as he started in CP (first year of primary school), so all the other kids were only just starting and making new friendships too - he’s also very talented at soccer, so he was a popular pick for the lunch time teams! Within about 3-4 months, their French was good enough to keep up with their peers and they were both feeling comfortable at school. It was great when they started swim lessons at school too, their friends were all blown away by their prowess in the pool - they’re pretty good by Aussie standards, but impressive compared to the rest of the world! 

 

It really took a whole year for our oldest to feel truly accepted into the friendship groups, though. As a parent, it was so painful to see him struggling when he’d been so settled with his friends back home in Australia. However, it’s also been one of the most wonderful things to watch him become bilingual and create secure friendships with French kids at school. They’re both really thriving now, which is such a relief and a joy to see. We’re so proud of how hard they’ve both worked to become fluent in French in such a short time and to overcome the challenges of not only starting a new school, but in another language. 

 

As for food, initially they didn’t like the French school lunches and ate mostly the endless pieces of baguette with butter for lunch. But now they eat almost everything they’re served up there and are super picky about their cheeses.. a comté (French cheese made from unpasteurised cow's milk) simply MUST be aged for at least 18 months and they love a nice goat’s cheese too!. Rest assured that whenever there is a grève (strike) - every term at least, they get a Vegemite sandwich and caramello koala or killer python in their lunchbox!

 

Oh and their favourite thing about school in France? No school on Wednesday. 

Thanks so much, Clare. I look forward to sharing Part Two of our interview soon where you reflect on some of your more memorable moments, and let us know if your French journey is set to continue. Until then, Clare can be found on Instagram @mme_cabernet_franks

And for another French-Australian story (mine 😊), please find below links to my 5 books (including Books 1-3 in my 'French at Heart' series). With thanks.

The links should take you to where you need to go, wherever you are in the world, to make a purchase.

• But you are in France, Madame: One family, three children, five bags and the promise of adventure living in the French Alps
• Weaving a French Life: An Australian story
• Love, fear and a return to France: A family memoir
• With bare feet and sandy toes: Growing up in Australia in the 1960s & 70s
• Talk and Play with your Child in French

Interview with writer Christine Betts

A few days, six months, a year, several years, multiple visits over many years, vicarious visits …  we all do our French affairs differently.

Today, I am chatting with Australian author, Christine Betts, whose first visit to Paris at the age of twenty-two was the bittersweet incarnation of a non-attainable joint project. We connected recently through our writing and our common passion for France. Read on for Christine’s story:

Thanks, Christine, for agreeing to this interview. 

Can you tell us a bit about yourself? Hi Catherine. I’m a Gold Coast girl on the outside and a little bit French on the inside.

How and when did your love of France begin? I fell in love with the Madeline picture books as a little girl, fuelling a passion for France, art, and books.

 You have travelled many times to France. Do you have a couple of stories from these trips that you could share with us?  Do you have any long-term French plans? Like a lot of people, I would love to spend a year in France sometime in the future. We have spent a month here and there but 12 months, to see the seasons, would be lovely. I was planning

my upcoming 50^th birthday celebrations in the countryside outside Paris but that may have to change now. 

In 2006 we spent a month wandering across France with our caravan. It was lovely to see our son making friends with children from all over Europe while us mums and dads lazed in camp chairs chatting and sipping cold drinks. We are still in contact with some of the families. 

My favourite Only-In-France memory of that trip was seeing the quirky entertainers who ply their trade at campgrounds across France in the summer. A cat and miniature goat circus? Only in France!

Your books are set in France. Is this an obvious choice for you? How do you go about researching your story lines? My first attempts at writing were my journals from my early trips to France. In 2005, I wrote a memoir called From There to Here via Paris. My sister is the only person who has read it and probably the only one who ever will. I think the reason I love Paris is that I went there with a broken heart and just being in that beautiful place showed me that life goes on. 

I seem to be perpetually working on a Paris-themed memoir of some description because Paris has been there at every important point in my life.

In 2017 I shifted gear, deciding to write a fictionalised account of a 2012 “girls’ trip” to Paris. I lucked across an historic B&B right near quai de la Tournelle with views of the towers of Notre Dame from the rooftop terrace. My first novel Hotel Déjà vu grew from that kernel of an idea, and the B&B inspired the grand mansion in the story, the home of the de la Roche family, even down to the pool in the basement. 

I had great fun using my own memories, photographs, and souvenirs to flesh out the story, but also used Google Maps a little. I know the inner areas of Paris well, but Maps was able to fill in little details. 

My second novel is mostly set in the Loire, so I was able to draw on that magical summer with my little boy in 2006. They might be in a crumbling chateau in the Loire, but of course, the characters take off to Paris for the night to stay in my imagined hotel, L'Écrivain – the Writer.

What writing projects do you have on the go at the moment? I am about to launch Alia Henry and the Ghost Writer (releasing tomorrow June 16), but I am now working on a story in the same ‘universe’ as Hotel Déjà vu. A couple go in search of the fabled time-portal to fix the terrible mess they have made of their lives. That’s a fun little side project! My passion project right now is set in modern-day London and Wiltshire, with an interwoven story set in Neolithic Gaul and England. Paris was always my favourite place in France but as I get a little older, I have developed a love for the French and English countryside, and this story includes stone circles and Celtic legends. As is in everything I write, there is a ‘supernatural’ element in this story but I’m not giving any spoilers. 

And just for a bit of fun: 

If you could choose to be any character from any period in French history, who would it be? And why? Ooh that’s easy! I would have to pick my name-sake Christine de Pizan, a French renaissance novelist who is the first known woman in France to have made her living solely from writing. She was a feminist and a bad ass. She wrote and published protest poems, utopian fiction about a city inhabited only by women, and a celebration of the achievements of Joan of Arc. I love her work because like Christine, my goal is to write female characters who are interesting and intelligent but above all, real.

Thanks so much Christine. I look forward to hearing of the progress of your new release and staying in touch.

Christine’s books are available in print and digital versions on Amazon here

You can follow Christine on

Instagram:… https://www.instagram.com/paristimetravel/

Facebook:… https://www.facebook.com/ParisTimeTravel/

Interview with' Let's Speak French'

I had a lot of fun doing this interview with Lise. Most of my work these days is in English, but Lise (Let's Speak French) teaches French and so we decided to do the interview in French as an extra bit of practice for her students. If you have the time, I'd love you to have a listen. For those who are just starting out learning French, there is also a transcript of our conversation to use as a guide.

Happy listening!

The Book Podcast with Rosemary Puddy

Photo credit: @grosgrainhomewares

On Christmas Day 2017, I wrote a blog post. Actually, by the time I had finished it, we were into the small hours of the next morning. It hadn't been a normal Christmas and, truthfully, the morning itself had been a little sombre. Getting out into the mountains for a lunchtime picnic had changed our perspective and cheered us up and by mid-afternoon, watching Die Hard, sipping champagne and anticipating our festive dinner, things were back on track.  Receiving notification that my interview on The Book Podcast was live, was the icing on the cake.

I didn't make much of it at the time and it got a little lost in Christmas, yet Rosemary's program deserves attention. Her story is that, after a stint on local radio, she was at home in her library examining her extensive collection of books when it struck her that very few books on her shelves were by women writers and even fewer by Australian women writers.

Was this because there weren't many Australian women writers? Was it because they weren't very good? Was it because they were overlooked in a male-dominated domain? She decided to find out and set about creating her podcast by reading books by, and then interviewing, Australian women writers. Her first interview aired in February 2017 and a year and a half later, her program is still going strong. Typically, one interview is played per week on a Tuesday morning in Australia.

Completely off the topic, I have just started running again (after a slight mishap when skiing in January). For this, my treadmill is brilliant as I can pace myself, set goals and speed up or slow down knowingly. It is also the perfect opportunity to listen to one of Rosemary's podcasts.

If you are a reader, or a writer, I would really encourage you to click on the link to The Book Podcast - link here. You will hear the back stories to the books, get hints on the craft of writing and will, I am sure, find Rosemary's interview style personal and easy to listen to. Each interview lasts for approximately 30 minutes.

My interview was Episode 43 Catherine Berry 'But you are in France, Madame'. Rosemary and I chatted about why I went to France with my family, the preparation phase, how the children settled into French living, coming back to Australia, why I wrote 'But you are in France, Madame' and whether that had been an objective all along (no!).

If you get a chance to check out the podcast and like what you hear, you can ensure that you don't miss future episodes by subscribing. It's free.

By the way, Rosemary's answers to the questions that she had asked herself - undoubtedly, there are many excellent Australian women writers. She hopes that her program is helping to bring them the attention and accolades that they deserve.

If, after listening to our interview, you would like to read about our family's French adventure, please contact me on cb222@me.com for a print copy of 'But you are in France, Madame', or click on the following link for a Kindle copy.

Vulnerable

'But you are in France, Madame' in store and online at French Cargo in Sydney

Rosemary Puddy produces and presents The Book Podcast Talking With Australian Women Writers. It was my turn this morning to be interviewed and I'll be sure to let you know when our discussion has aired.

It was fun, although when I'm listening to myself there is every chance that I will be physically or figuratively cringing. I suspect I rambled a bit, and Rosemary's attentive listening encouraged me to talk, and then talk some more. We finished up, but once the microphones were off, more stories came out, including the rawness of living for much of the time in France as a single parent.

A couple of months into our year-long (or 4...) adventure, my husband headed back to Australia. It wasn't supposed to be like that and I remember clearly the solitary drive back from dropping him at the airport. Stopping for fuel, a wave of vulnerability engulfed me. What if I put the wrong fuel in the car? What if my credit card wasn't accepted? What if my French wasn't as good as it needed to be? What if I got lost, or one of the children got sick, or if the heating stopped working, or the car broke down or...

I had no friends, no family, no work or work colleagues, no routines and no 'normal'. I did have three young, dependent children who were counting on me to be all the things that an adult is expected to be. Looking back now, how do I judge myself? Even though on paper, the words foolish and irresponsible come to mind, I will refute this every time. I am proud of our tenacity and our just-keep-going spirit, our sense of adventure and determinedness to take the road less obvious, and am thankful that our children have discovered the joy of thinking differently.

PS If you would like to read more of our family story here is the Amazon link for a Kindle copy.
If you would prefer a print copy, an Affiliate link is to be found in Kristin Espinasse's French word-a-day blog. A purchase here costs no more and would be so very much appreciated by us both.